10. “I have a child”
Declare if you are a parent to the person you are hoping on pursuing love with, whether you are in that child’s life or not. Men have often been irresponsible in rejecting the child they have with a woman in the past and keep this from the new woman in their life, only for it to bring complications and feelings of mistrust. This truth can never be fully hidden, one day it will come out. If you don’t have the guts to declare your own flesh and blood, you have no right to seek new love.

autograph on my heart

9. “I was once married”
Were you once married? Declare this to your date, tell your date exactly what happened, did you divorce, separate, is the divorce final?.. Are you in a marriage union and still going out on dates with others? Shame on you, stop wooing someone new, go work on your marriage. If you want to date again, conclude the divorce. Either you are in or you’re out.

ellen johnson sirleaf

8. “I am not over my ex”
If you are still in love with your ex, hoping for things between you and your ex to work out, declare that. Don’t give your date false hopes of a future yet you are still dreaming of your ex. Declare it so that your date will hold back his/her feelings.

sitting on top of the world

7. “I am a virgin”
Are you waiting for someone extra special, waiting for marriage in order for you to have sex? Declare that. Declare your thoughts about sex so that the person hoping to love you will know what to expect when with you. Talk about how you will deal with matters of horniness. Your date could be expecting sex the first night yet you are waiting for a special night.


6. “I am sick”
Are you H.I.V positive, with cancer, an addiction, epileptic? Declare that. Having an illness or condition will not make you unlovable. Help your date and future lover to love you by declaring your status. Empower your lover by being open at the beginning, so that he/she will walk best with you.




5. “I don’t want any children”
When people are dating, they could be seeing a family in the future with you. Declare if you are interested in having children. Your date might be dreaming of a child with you yet you never want children. May be you even had a vasectomy or a tubal ligation and your poor date is hoping for parenthood one day with you.

the mother of my child

4. “I don’t believe in marriage”
Are you planning on getting married one day? If you are not, don’t waste the time of someone looking for a spouse

family car

3. “I am planning on being polygamous”
Man, don’t propose to a woman to a monogamous marriage and then as soon as she enters thinking your love for her will be exclusive you change and start the search for a second, third, and fourth wife. Tell the woman exactly what she’s getting herself into so that she can better say “Yes” or “No”


2. “I believe in God”
Are you praying for a Godly family with a Godly spouse? Then don’t waste time with someone who has no use for God.

Do you want nothing about God in your love-life? Then don’t continue loving someone who believes love comes from God. Someone who will want to pray with you, read the Word with you but you detest all that’s Godly.

serene dayan

1. “I am bi-sexual”
Some people marry someone of the opposite sex to cover up their love for the same sex. Come out clearly from the beginning; to a wife, the most hurtful thing can be losing her husband to a man or her husband cheating on her with a man. To the man he needs to know if the woman is all for a masculine love, or will in secret be fantasizing about women?

kissing my way to my wife's twin grapes


To read more of Dayan Masinde’s writing on love, you may purchase “WHEN ANGELS MAKE LOVE”- poetry book by Dayan Masinde on Amazon. Click on this link for direction http://www.amazon.com/dp/B00JVUQAPY



10. “Are you a model?”

Most men always equate beauty to modeling. As if modeling is the only career for gorgeous ladies. You can be a lawyer, a chef, a doctor, a business woman, a journalist, a police woman and still be attractive and hot!

9. “I love you?”

Some men get carried away by their infatuation of a lady that they say it so cheaply. How do you love someone you don’t really know? If you use such intimate words too quickly and loosely, your intentions are in doubt. Are you a man or a boy? A boy spurts words out of infatuation, a man covers the woman from the pain and confusion his reckless use of words and deeds can bring her.

john wesley8. “Your mum must be a terrorist cause you’re the bomb”

This is the worst line to use in these days of frequent terrorist activities. No one likes being associated with Al-Qaeda, Al-Shabaab or Boko Haram; especially if they can’t take a joke.

ellen johnson sirleaf7. “Nice ass you got there”

Never show a woman you view her as a sex object; that the only reason you are approaching her is because of her body. The first impression you give to a lady should never be “Hey sexy, I want to sleep with you even though I don’t even know your name”

LET'S GET IT ON!!!6. “Hey sweetheart”

Women love to feel special, if a man shows himself generous in using intimate names to any woman even if it’s to her and yet they barely know each other; she will become suspicious of him and question whether he means his words. Darling, beautiful, babie- special names should be reserved for someone special; it takes time for someone to become special.

tania5. “Lose your boyfriend”

A man shouldn’t approach a lady the first day as someone out to attack her current relationship, no matter how pathetic her current relationship is. A good woman is protective of her man and she will repel you if you attack the love she has. But even if she is willing to play and flirt with you because of the dullness in her current relationship, she will not take you seriously because if you don’t respect what she has right now, how will you respect what you two might have?

sitting on top of the world4. “Heaven must be missing an angel

This is just one of the many cheesy, corny and over-used lines spoken. A woman loves a man who is fresh, different, exciting and creative. She’ll be turned off if she thinks you are the type who copies and pastes ways of approaching a lady from discussions men have when they group together or from a movie scene.

on board flight L.O.V.E3. “Niaje kamrembro” – “wassup little girl”

One of the ways to get to a woman’s heart is through words. By your words she will know how you view her. Whatever language you use, make sure the words you use don’t give an impression that you take her casually or that you’re immature or demeaning.

m'hoyah moh2. “I am here to save you”

Don’t approach a full grown woman, capable of holding her own as if you being in her life is doing her a favor; as if you are her savior. Only girls can be damsels in distress, but a grown woman, no matter how tough her life is, she wants a partner not a man who thinks she is zero without him. She wants a man to walk with, not one to worship.

kipusa kwenye balcony1. Stop using a pick up line

Why are you using a pick up line in the first place? Ladies are not goods to be picked up but whole beings to engage with, know, respect and relate with. The best conversation starts when a man is himself to a lady. Just be yourself. Honesty is very attractive!



To read more of Dayan Masinde’s writing on love, you may purchase “WHEN ANGELS MAKE LOVE”- poetry book by Dayan Masinde on Amazon. Click on this link for direction http://www.amazon.com/dp/B00JVUQAPY



10. How you handle correction

Do you get offended when you are faulted? Are you easy to correct? Do you admit when wrong? A lover looking to see if you are a suitable life-partner will look at how you own up to responsibility, how easy you are to work with.

binti afrique9. How you handle “NO”

Relationships/ marriage is about compromise, not every day you will get everything going your way. Will you be OK to listen to your partner? To cede ground? Will you be OK if your partner says “No” to your option for good reasons? Will you take competition inside the relationship?… If your lover says “No” to your date when you request because of work will you be vexed? If your lover doesn’t pick up your phone call for legitimate reasons, will you be furious for no reason?

roar dayan8. How you handle failure

Sometimes you will fail, sometimes your lover will fall. If it happens, will you give up on yourself? Will you give up on your lover? Are you easy to discourage? Do you only love when things are going smoothly?

protect africa7. How you handle money

Do you look like the type who will be changed when you get more money? Do you judge your partner based on how much he/ she earns? Or do you have a low self-esteem because your partner earns more? Will your partner have to constantly keep reminding you it’s OK if you have less than he/ she does?

family car6. How you handle your temper

Tempers will flare sometimes, the closer you get to each other the easier it is to step on each other’s nerves? What do you do when you are angry? Do you curse, insult, drown yourself in alcohol, do irrational things?… or do you pray, calm down, seek the route of peace?… Do you avoid issues or are you the type to seek solutions. Everyone wants a partner easy to work and live with.

uplifting music5. How you handle tragic news

Are you a comforter? Are you able to sooth your lover when your lover is in pain? Do you make your lover feel better? When someone close to your lover dies, do you help in mourning? Or do you expect your lover to comfort you but you fall short when your lover needs your support?…When things tragic happen, do you share with your lover or keep things to yourself? Do you only share the good things?

she's missing her king4. How you handle secrets

Are you trustworthy? Are you easy to talk with? Does your lover feel safe with you? Will you use the secrets your lover tells you as ammunition when you two fight? Can you keep the personal things in your relationship from the public?

planting kisses3. How you handle your ex

How do you talk about your ex? Does your ex still have an influence in your life? Do you have closure from your past or is there room your past will come to damage your future? Are you wrongly being suspicious of your lover because of the wrongs your ex did?

sweerie don't look behind, but i think they are talking about us2. How you handle yourself

Do you have a low self esteem? Are you a pessimist? Are you full of pride? Are you self-centred?… Or do you know yourself? Are you fun to be around? Do you find yourself sexy or do you depend on the opinion of others? How do you handle sex? What’s your view about sex? Are you the type who talks cheaply about sex, a flirt? Are you the type who finds sex to be a taboo? No one likes a boring sex partner who over thinks things. No one likes a loose partner.

LET'S GET IT ON!!!1. How you handle children

A lover who is keen on a lasting relationship, marriage will pay attention to how you treat children or how you talk about children. For a man, he will look out for her motherly signs: how does she handle other people’s children and if she is a single mother, how does she handle her own child/ children? For a woman, she will look for a father figure: is the man mature enough to raise someone, does he have qualities of leading, or nurturing?

feed the baby dear, i shall feed you


To read more of Dayan Masinde’s writing on love, you may purchase “WHEN ANGELS MAKE LOVE”- poetry book by Dayan Masinde on Amazon. Click on this link for direction http://www.amazon.com/dp/B00JVUQAPY



Hashtag #Idontwanttotrend
Trends come and trends go
But my love, I want to be top on your list
And never replaced or dethroned

Hashtag #Leaveusalone
Will the world please let my lover and I be?
Keep my private life private
Too private what we share to post it in the open gallery

I am not looking for many likes on my posted photos
I will not strip off my clothes, be a stripper on social media
I’m not desperate for hundreds of likes from strangers
My lover loves how I look, I don’t need a nod from the masses

I don’t desire fame
Every one doesn’t have to know my name
But my love, let each beat of your heart
Know me intimately and personally

I don’t have to be on the cover of magazines
But my lover, cover me from this world of thieves
You be the only one who shoots me down
With your loaded magazine from your pistol of love

My aim is not to be stinking rich
The Forbes list doesn’t need to know I exist
I just want enough to provide for you and I, a perfume of affection
I won’t chase after money, I’d rather love the people around me

No, I don’t want a shallow life
Not when your heart is this deep in love
I will keep my priorities right
So that I never be the one you left


on my back


To read more of Dayan Masinde’s writing on love, you may purchase “WHEN ANGELS MAKE LOVE”- poetry book by Dayan Masinde on Amazon. Click on this link for direction http://www.amazon.com/dp/B00JVUQAPY



Knock knock, I bang the door

My lover opens, and I fall to the floor

With my tears, I wipe my lover’s feet

This is my song, I write on the sheet


Things used to be so good

Until I got stupid and walked away

My lover was walking hand in hand with me

But I got lost and ran away


I don’t know what I was looking for

I had it all with my lover

I said some nasty things when I left

I left my lover in pain as I took an exit


Out there I had no dignity

Because my royalty only works when I am in love

So I am back, back to my lover

Back where I belong


The prodigal lover that I am

My lover lifts me up, I tremble

Will I be accepted back?

Or I’m I too late?


My lover looks me in the eye

I go on and on about how sorry I am

My lover shuts my chatter box lips

“Shh… I forgive you” I am told


I silence my lover

Tell my lover to please listen

I shouldn’t come and act like nothing happened

An apology must be said, an apology must be heard


“May I speak now?” my lover asks

After my minutes of remorse

“I love you, thank you for caring about my feelings

Welcome back. I kept my heart for you”






To read more of Dayan Masinde’s writing on love, you may purchase “WHEN ANGELS MAKE LOVE”- poetry book by Dayan Masinde on Amazon. Click on this link for direction http://www.amazon.com/dp/B00JVUQAPY




10. You run away
Are you avoiding your ex at all cost? Does hearing your ex’s name gives you a kick? Are you drowning yourself in alcohol, jumping from one club to another pretending to be having fun as a way of moving on? You haven’t truly moved on until you can look back at your past and your past doesn’t move you. You should bump into your ex in the streets and feel nothing- say hi and move on with your life instead of reminiscing. Running away is a sign of denial.

619. You compare your new lover with your ex
Do you find yourself measuring your current lover with your ex? Those are clear signs of you missing your past. Move on or go back, make up your mind.

sweerie don't look behind, but i think they are talking about us8. You become a stalker
A private eye you have become. Obsessed with tracking your ex’s movements, what your ex posts on Facebook and social media, questioning if your ex is happy without you?

john wesley7. You keep recalling the past
Do you find yourself going through the old messages your ex sent you? Staring at your old pictures together? You still have that box safely hidden with the special gifts your ex gave you? Do you find yourself fighting the desire to pick up the phone to call your ex? Wondering how you two would have been if you remained a couple?


6. You are jealous
Do you feel a bad taste in your mouth when you see or hear your ex with someone? Do you compare your ex’s current lover with yourself, of course saying how pathetic your ex’s new lover is unlike you? Are you planning on destroying your ex’s new relationship?

she's missing her king5. You bad mouth your ex
Some will do everything to ruin the reputation of their ex. They will unveil all the ex’s dirty secrets to the world, make up false stories, exaggerate the ex’s flaw to ruin the ex’s reputation before the public. These are the type who will post private photos and videos of the ex online. You have not moved on if you have not forgiven.

inspekat mwala

4. You move on too quickly
Some will jump into a new relationship, get married quickly, use a new lover as a desperate attempt to forget their ex. They will force themselves on someone new, force love. Rushing because they want to go into a new relationship before the ex does too; thinking that it will be tragic to remain single yet the ex finds someone new, gets married and starts a family. In the end, they hurt, their victim of a lover hurts and their forced relationship sucks. Do you find yourself wanting to show your ex how happy you are without him/ her? Go into a new relationship because you are truly in love, not to get back at your ex or to bandage your true suppressed feelings. That is unfair to your new lover. Give yourself time to heal.

kipusa kwenye balcony3. You use your child as an excuse
Some will device traps using the child as bait. They will use the child they have together with their ex as a bridge to their ex.

family car2. Your ex still turns you on
Do you still fantasize about your ex? You can’t stand looking your ex in the eye because you will melt? You will want to steal a kiss? Rip your ex’s clothes off? Live out your former explosive scenes? Is your ex still your definition of sexiness?

biro sketch1. You can’t attend your ex’s wedding
Would you turn down an invite to your ex’s wedding? Pretending to be busy? Do you refuse to go because you object to the marriage?…You know you will stand up when the officiator asks “Is is there anyone with any reason why these two should not wed?”



To read more of Dayan Masinde’s writing on love, you may purchase “WHEN ANGELS MAKE LOVE”- poetry book by Dayan Masinde on Amazon. Click on this link for direction http://www.amazon.com/dp/B00JVUQAPY